nopenopenope

Without drugs, I am bored. Not sure if apathy or what exactly. Seems to be that I have certain symptoms fitting secondary alexithymia, might be a repressing thing of a ptsd nature, especially if we take a look at how detached I've become from everything during the last year. Don't know what to do.

First thing to do is to kick smoking, which isn't going to be easy, especially if we take into account that most people I've surrounded myself with lately are smokers, and I've become prone to not seek new social contact. Like a damn cluster of problems.

Quetiapine will help me with withdrawal symptoms such as sleeplessness, but besides that it will not be easy. I could really use some help and support, but I really don't feel as if I have someone I can ask of that. I've become very convinced that nobody cares about how I feel or how I'm doing, at least in general, and, in return, I've become more and more indifferent to the feelings of others. I just see no reason to care about anything.

It seems like it will be some solitary struggle once again; although, that has been the case for the most part, really.

I admit that I do think it'd be easier to just ragequit.