Something's definitely not right. I've become more empathetic lately.
Not that I was always numbed out or rather indifferent, a long time ago I wasn't, but now it's coming back and I hate it. Want it damn gone.
There is a possibility of an onset of another depressive episode, due to the ways I've felt in the last couple of days. Not that I'd be sad/miserable all the time or anything, but the intensity of it when it hits me, and the thoughts accompanying it make it rather tough.
I am seriously afraid of this.
Friday, November 11, 2011
Thursday, November 3, 2011
Hadn't written a thing here in a long while.
So, mentioning:
Watched Pandorum recently. Loved it, reccomend it.
Watched Cube before that. Fucking amazing.
Aliens is better than the third part and I'm sick of the 4th, cause I've watched it too many times.
Somehow, I get enough luck to mostly end up liking the movies I watch.
Oh, and, although pretty much everyone knows that, I have two teeth extracted, 1-1 and today I had 1-5 extracted, too.
The thing is, I had a habit of poking my tongue in the hole of 1-5, and now that it's gone, I have nowhere to really put my tongue when I'm angry. I liked that hole.
Also, my grandma seriously thinks I'm non-human and soulless, because of my ''skewed'' moral values and overall perception of life. She honestly thinks that I have drastically changed in the years, not that I just had hid a shitload of things and pretended to care about the things I didn't, really.
My conclusion is, either I'm really differing from most of the people I see (not the ones I hang out with, similars attract) on a fundamental level, or most of them are doing what I stopped. I think it's a part of both with more push on the latter.
I still think spirituality is bullshit and crave for the day I see at least anyone argumenting something for it, and not just talk about vibrations, energies, chakras and all that shit. I want fucking evidence. I am a skeptic.
Oh, also, I remembered how back in school, we had that ass-hat lecture about why we shouldn't do drugs. One of the arguments was that drugs change personality (what doesn't?) and drug-users tend to become more cynical.
Well, what's the fucking problem with that? I mean, I am a cynic, I know those overall sun-is-shining-and-it-is-a-miracle-that-i-live people don't get the attitude, but I bet my ass that anyone who has gone through at least some of the shit life gives you can appreciate cynicism. Or, in the words of Nathan, HORSE the Band vocalist:
And damn, even if most people don't like cynics, cynics like cynics. Reason why I still like Carlin, that dead fucker.
I also thought I would make each word in this sentence different.
How about letters?
So, mentioning:
Watched Pandorum recently. Loved it, reccomend it.
Watched Cube before that. Fucking amazing.
Aliens is better than the third part and I'm sick of the 4th, cause I've watched it too many times.
Somehow, I get enough luck to mostly end up liking the movies I watch.
Oh, and, although pretty much everyone knows that, I have two teeth extracted, 1-1 and today I had 1-5 extracted, too.
The thing is, I had a habit of poking my tongue in the hole of 1-5, and now that it's gone, I have nowhere to really put my tongue when I'm angry. I liked that hole.
Also, my grandma seriously thinks I'm non-human and soulless, because of my ''skewed'' moral values and overall perception of life. She honestly thinks that I have drastically changed in the years, not that I just had hid a shitload of things and pretended to care about the things I didn't, really.
My conclusion is, either I'm really differing from most of the people I see (not the ones I hang out with, similars attract) on a fundamental level, or most of them are doing what I stopped. I think it's a part of both with more push on the latter.
I still think spirituality is bullshit and crave for the day I see at least anyone argumenting something for it, and not just talk about vibrations, energies, chakras and all that shit. I want fucking evidence. I am a skeptic.
Oh, also, I remembered how back in school, we had that ass-hat lecture about why we shouldn't do drugs. One of the arguments was that drugs change personality (what doesn't?) and drug-users tend to become more cynical.
Well, what's the fucking problem with that? I mean, I am a cynic, I know those overall sun-is-shining-and-it-is-a-miracle-that-i-live people don't get the attitude, but I bet my ass that anyone who has gone through at least some of the shit life gives you can appreciate cynicism. Or, in the words of Nathan, HORSE the Band vocalist:
Life is a fucking toilet.
And damn, even if most people don't like cynics, cynics like cynics. Reason why I still like Carlin, that dead fucker.
I also thought I would make each word in this sentence different.
How about letters?
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