Fuck you, world!

Feeling drowsy, tired, and in a rather bad mood.
The real question is why don't I have enough motivation to put an end to all of this. Like I claimed, there are several ways of loneliness, mine is not made by not having people around me, but rather by not having people that actually understand me. The ones that are around understand only a part, or think they understand, but I see that they don't. Maybe I am ill . . . I'm not sure, all I know is that I have a lot to read, a lot to listen to and a lot to revise.

I never thought it could get this dumber, but I guess there's still worse to come.

I am just baffled with the stupidity. A 20 year old male tried to convince me today that pre-marital sex leads to depression. Of course I considered it bullshit, since, well, I've had sex and I cannot possibly imagine how the sexual act itself can lead to depression.
It is not the sexual act itself, that leads to depression, it is the beliefs associated with sex. If a person has unrealistic beliefs regarding sex (which are often fed by religion, media, stupid parents, morals and so on), of course the person will view sex as something it is not. Sex is a sexual activity, nothing more, nothing less. Sex can be with one person at a time, two persons at a time, a dog, a rhino, or all of those together whilst one of the persons is playing an accordeon.
Depression comes after these people either get their beliefs crushed and need time to adjust to the real world, or keep believing the bullshit they believed before and blame it on the sexual activity they did.

I still cannot comprehend there could be someone this stupid. Seriously, just . . .

Don't forget to wipe!

Hello, I am freedom of speech. In most cases, all people do with me is wipe their rear ends, because, if your opinion contradicts the opinion of the society you live in, I am of no worth.
Of course, I am not satisfied with the position I'm given, but people are way too intolerant or scared from an opinion that differs from theirs for that to happen.

Censorship is censorship, when it is something people believe in and support, however, censhorship gains a different appearance, when it's something people are against.

Do you want to know what's the worst thing about censorship? It's that you ███████████████censored███████████████

Death and artists.

Van Gogh, Francis Bacon and other artists became more famous after their death. While some of them had recognition during the lifetime, it seems that death has some sort of auto-advertising effect. People tend to pay attention to people either when they're dying or dead. Isn't that quite ironic? I am sure Van Gogh or Jackson Pollock could use some more support during their lifetime, but it seems that it isn't so. Do all artists, in order to be valued, have to die first?

What pisses me off like hell.

You know what just pissed the flaming fuck out of me? How thousands (or more) people watched a video of soldiers returning home from Iraq and those people (ones that watched) claim that they were crying and that those, who say anything against those ''heroes'', these whiners or the video are heartless.

Let's start off with the fact, that a person cannot be heartless and survive. Heart is not responsible for emotions, the brain is, get it right you damn morons! And yes, I know that it's a figure of speech meaning that this type of people lacks sympathy and/or empathy (depending on how the person understands it). The thing is, that the people who are attacking you whiners are the ones (in most cases, at least) that have more empathy and understanding of the whole thing. We feel sorry for the children that have fathers fighting in Iraq, but not because their fathers are fare away. We feel sorry because their fathers are labeled as heroes although they are not. They are either imbeciles, greedy bastards or just plain violent (depending on the reason they go to that war at all). The reason we feel sorry for those children is that they are going to grow up patriotic in a sense that they would be willing to go to war just like their fathers did. The reason we feel sorry for them is that they don't have a father for the period he is gone there killing people. The reason we feel sorry for them is that people like you make other people believe bullshit.
However, people like me think that lying to masses is wrong, and let's accept it, the war is all about money. You are not fighting terrorism, how could you fight it, anyway? You might be fighting a war in Iraq, but at the very same time a small, but dedicated terrorist group could be positioned, say, in NY, or United Kingdom, or Laos, or any other country. What is terrorism anyway? I think it's just a mislabel for someone who fights for their freedom or personal beliefs, nothing more, but, please, correct me if I'm wrong.
War has always been about money, always. Land, oil, people, gas, and so on, all of those are resources. And if you got recources, you got means to making cash. It's as simple as that.

So, to anyone who STILL doesn't understand this, please, do the humanity a favor, die as soon as possible, by any means necessary. The world can live without an imbecile like you. And chances are, without the likes of you, things would only get better. Maybe not better in your moralistically ''right'' sense, but things would change, and I believe that it's exactly what the humanity/world needs. It needs a change.

If you see . . .

If you see beneath the surface, it means you've looked.
At times that fact alone is more important than what you see beneath said surface. You had the courage to look. You had the will to look. You had the desire to look. And you looked. What you found might have shocked you, it might have crushed your dreams or brought you happiness, it doesn't matter. You looked. And that is what truly matters. If you looked once, you will be willing to look more, no matter the results, and thus, you will be gaining deeper insight than those, who think they've seen what's hidden behind the mask.
People wear faces. Face is our mask. If we have no face, we have no mask. The question that bothers me is, why do people need another mask on the mask they already wear? Sometimes it's for hiding one disguise under another in relation to safety, sometimes it's out of interest. Will there be anyone willing to surpass every single layer just to find what is hidden deep down within? Sometimes, yes, but I have to tell you, when they destroy every single one of your disguises and see what is at the core, they are going to be severely disappointed.

Highscore at the moment set for This Wreckage.

So, I've set a highscore for the map This Wreckage, which peaks at 411'759 points with 6 hours, 46 minutes and 17 seconds of gameplay time. My previous score was 278'216 points with 6 hours, 29 minutes and 36 seconds of gameplay time, which was only a little bit ahead of the previous leading score of 269'598 with 7 hours 47 minutes and 4 seconds of gameplay time set by VeNoM (as much as I dislike writing in alt caps, that is the persons desired alias). So it can be safely claimed that I crumbled not only his highscore, but my own as well, and that only a person that will be determined to set a highscore will propably defeat this one. If such a person appears, well, I'm up for a challenge.

Sometimes.

Sometimes I wish I had the guts to thrust that scalpel through my throat, or strangle myself for long enough to cause asphyxia. It is, propably, safe to claim that I am ill. Not like it matters, anyway. I am the exact same organic matter that you are. I am going to die, one way or another, and I am going to decay. The only thing ''wrong'' with me is that, at times, I wish it to happen faster. I wish it to happen right this moment. Suddenly, without explanations, just taking each and every single one of my problems away, just taking me away. Fuck this.

This Wreckage and White China

For the last two days I've been going through the Warcraft III map called ''This Wreckage''. It's an RPG style map by RDZ, and I have to admit, the best one I've seen so far. On my first run, I spent 12 hours total playing that one map. What makes it so good? To start off, there's the weapon/shield system, there's a backpack, an ability to get several companions, tons of side quests and terrific setting. The terrain and doodoads are all increasing the feel of the map and it doesn't feel as if something's been left empty. I highly recommend this map to anyone who enjoys this type of maps and has some time to waste.

As for White China, I've had it's melody in my head for a while now, never could've thought that I would actually like it.

That's basically all I did lately, lazed off and played videogames.

Introduction

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